Events in your past are significant but not defining.

For my last and final project I took a look at how things in your life effect you and your adulthood. I focused on events I thought may be important while I grew up, writing memoirs about them along with research on the effects it may have. I then made a sweatshirt design to print and sell, the profit going to the Baltimore Child Abuse Center.

My memoirs were events from my life. I questioned why I am the way I am now, a polar opposite of who I used to be. To answer that question I had to go back to preschool years, all the way to middle school. Listing everything I found significant and then shortening the list to something I felt more comfortable with sharing about. I wrote many memoirs about the memories, giving me a more clearer perspective on what has happened. It gave me a chance to go back, and answer some the questions I had for myself.

As part of the writing format I typed in a mirrored effect, the research I'd done about each situation. The facts gave a more analytical approach to my memoirs, stating what each situation meant and the effects it has on your child development and in your adult years. I learned about why I might have responded or behaved the way I did growing up. It didn't however answer the question I set out for myself which was "What would my future look like?" With all the reading I'd done the studies and professors always ended the same way; they always said that children could fall victim or become resilient, that the effects vary form child to child. All in all we decide our own future, there is nothing in our past that can limit us except for ourselves. I made the realization that I use my past as an excuse for my emotions and behavior, what I saw was that some people have had it worse and do better than before. So why do I let memories be my limitation? The research was as much for my teachers as it was for me, I took a lesson away from this. We limit ourselves, and we determine what we do with our past and how our future will turn out.

As a way of giving back I focused on children who were victims of abuse. Creating the statement of "We're not all Black and Blue" as the main focus. They're are different types of abuse and maltreatment, not all physical and clearly seen. When I have told people about my life I was sometimes given the response of being called a victim, and that it was abusive. To this day I deny to think that way or agree but it makes me think. All of those people would have never guest this was the case, they didn't expect to hear those things from me. All of them seemed shocked because it is not clearly shown. And that in itself is the problem, abuse is not always  put on display in a person's life. They often hide or avoid it, usually not talking about to other people even those they trust. That can be the most damaging to their situation because they let it build up inside. I want people to wear the shirt I made as a reminder that these are everyday people and kids that go through this and it's not just the families that have been reported. It is known that many cases aren't even reported so the statistics are much higher than what is told.

I hand painted the design 32" by 39" made of acrylic paint. I took the symbolism of abandoned and used toys, how kids often feel like damaged goods from some of the bad things that have happened to them. I then use the website Gallore to make this sweatshirt that i will advertise and sell online and through social media.